Carlos Xuma's Dating Tips for Guys

Guys, just to let you know, I'll be guest speaking at the Love Systems conference on the weekend of 10/17/2008 in Los Angeles…

Hopefully I'll see you there!

- CX

Heey Carlos,

First of all, you're the man. Thanks for your motivating stuff. If your ever are in the Netherlands call me and i give you a tour…

But I have a problem right now:

I am getting succes with your program and went out last saturday to test it.
I met a girl, a young one, 19 years old (im 24). I danced with her, kissed her and SHE asked me my telephone number. We exchanged numbers and i thought it all was going well. I gave her a kiss goodbye.

The next day she text me that she had really fun and want to meet me again SOON. So i replied that I also had fun en want to see her next Monday. She replied that she like the idea. So all went well I thought..Sunday night she text me: "What are you doing? XX".

I replied nothing because it was very late and i was sleeping and must work the next day…..

Monday morning I tried to call her, but no answer…I tried again in the afternoon, still no answer. In the evening i send her a message with the text: "Are you scared of meet me"

I send this because she was a little insecure saturday…

Now it's tuesday and she haven't replie anything…. I think it's very strange, she even gave her msn adress and add me..

I don't know what the problem is, maybe… you know the answer….

Many thanks Carlos,

Sincerely yours,

Robert E.
The Netherlands
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CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:

I hear you. This is always strange – and slightly disappointing.

But shame on you for putting so much hope and focus on ONE woman. You must have gotten a little attached.

Ask yourself, what would an Alpha do? (WWAD?)

First of all, you should already have had a clear time and place to meet her on Monday night. You shouldn't need to call her again.

Second, you don't ever text insecure messages to a woman.

ONLY text her fun and playful texts. I know you might think you were being playful, but that message did not pull her closer. In fact it probably pushed her away.

Drop her for a couple days, then CALL her and act like nothing happened. Line up dates for the rest of your week. (Never count on just one woman to fill your calendar.)

If she doesn't call you back, she's clearly a flake. You can keep calling her, but you must mentally reduce her to LOW status in your line-up.

Yes, it's just like pro sports, my friend. She's either a performer, or a bench warmer. You can't make a great athlete; you can only give them a chance to shine.

Remember, a woman's state is momentary and fleeting.

And ESPECIALLY a 19 year old. Right?

Good luck…

- CX

Dear Carlos,

I would first like to thank you for everything, it has changed my life.I have many girls attracted to me,thanks to the fact that I pursued my own dreams and passions. But I'm in a bit of a fix..

There is this really hot girl that I know,a 9 in my opinion.I talked to her a couple of times,and she's always complimenting me on my guitar playing ability,and I'm always teasing her,but once in a while I do throw in a compliment, but I don't keep repeating that compliment as I have learnt too.

Anyways, this girl told me last night she had a problem with trusting guys, mainly because of her ex. She talked to me for 4 hours and DIDNT let me go because 'She loved talking to me'.I don't quite get this.

Where should I go with this girl?It is quite contradicting as she doesn't trust guys,but then talks to me for more than 4 hours.Should I go ahead?And,how should I go about it?

I've talked to this girl a couple of times,and I've done no WUSSLIKE behaviour,I'm pretty sure.

What should I do,dear teacher?

Thanks,
AJ
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CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:

(WARNING… Tough talk follows. I hope you have a strong stomach.)

Her trust issues are irrelevant. If she told you about them, she's just trying to test you and find a way to drive you away. She wants to see if she can get you to try and wuss out by telling you that she has these supposed "issues".

And guess what?

You are falling right into it.

She's using you as her emotional tampon, dude. After she fills you up with all her "therapy" talk and "men are bad" bitterness, she'll toss you in the dumpster with all the other clueless morons who fall into this trap.

No offense, though. It's my hope that you are not clueless, after all, you're getting success and understanding through my programs.

But I'm calling bullshit on your claim that SHE kept you on the phone.

No, it wasn't her.

YOU stayed on the phone.

If you want to get off the phone, it's easy: You tell her you have a LIFE to get on with, and then you say it was nice talking to her, and then you HANG UP.

She was testing you again.

Flunk.

FLUSH.

4 HOURS, DUDE???

I'm smacking my forehead here.

Here's a little memory trick I want you to use so that you don't mistake one thing for another:

• A woman who stays with you on the phone for 4 hours is your FRIEND. (i.e., the person she will NOT sleep with.)

• A woman who stays in bed with you for 4 hours having wild monkey love is your SEX KITTEN. (i.e., the person who can be your friend AND your lover.)

And now here's your rehab program:

1) Smack yourself in the back of the head a couple times. I'm serious, hit yourself with your own hand. It's quite stimulating, and it may get through. I do this when I've done something REALLY dumb to make sure I don't repeat it.

2) Do not EVER talk with a woman for 4 hours again.

3) Forget about this girl. She's gone. Lost.

4) Remember that any woman that TELLS you she has trust issues is just testing you. The women with REAL trust issues will cover it up with misleading behavior until you're good and addicted to her, and then she disappears. She's too busy trying to convince herself through overly intimate behavior that she has these issues, so she'd NEVER admit it.

5) Go out and meet 10 new women this week. (And re-read #2 above.)

Simple?

Yes.

But an attractive woman will always test you like this. It's the only way she can know for certain that you're "for real." Especially with about a hundred other walking hard-ons looking to weasel their way into her life.

She knows how to screen the losers out, and it's a great way to keep her life dork-free. Hell, I even use certain tests on women that keep away the flakes and nuts.

The problem is that the blustering and bravado of a "bad boy" can get right through her tests pretty easily, leaving her in a puddle of cRaZy on the floor. That's why it's up to us Alpha Men to save her from the dorks and jerks.

- Carlos Xuma

Sup Carlos?
I'm getting better at approaching and using [various methods] lately and brought home my first girl Saturday night since starting the material. Things went pretty well. We hooked up. In fact, I knew even before she met me that she wanted me… she couldn't take her eyes off me.

Anyway, we made plans to meet up for lunch today, but when I IM'ed her she said she had to meet with her student advisor and wanted to reschedule. I just sure, no problem.

Then, she says she still wanted to call after her class got out and I said that was fine too.

Anyway, 1:30 rolls around and she still hasn't called. I said screw it, I'll just grab a bite to eat then head to the gym for an hour.

This is where it gets good…

At the campus food court, I actually see her their with one of her girlfriends. She didn't see me I don't believe, but I was pretty irritated. I ate then just went to the gym.

I feel fine now, but what do you guys think she is doing? I assume it's a test to see if I will call her asking her why she hasn't called me, but I won't give in. How would any of you have handled it?

Also, I don't plan on calling her until she calls me, if she does.

When she does, how should I act? What should I say?
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CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:

You're planning too much. You've gone into the realm of TRYING to make everything work rather than just letting your natural Alpha Habits take over.

You're placing way too much emphasis on figuring out what she's thinking, and what it all means.

It means nothing.

You must simply act from a place of strength and belief in your own reality and your own world.

Without this calm sureness in your own skin, none of that other stuff matters.

Guys, when you are all wrapped up in trying to manipulate or engineer a certain RESULT, you miss the point.

Mistakes:

1) Instant messaging her to "check-in" on your lunch date. Bad. Don't do that. If she has to cancel, it's her job to tell you so that you can discover the quality of her character. "Sure, no problem," is a wuss reply. You should have been teasing her and busting her balls.

2) Waiting on her call. This places far too much emphasis on her as a result. You handed all your power over to her by giving HER the control. No matter what she says, she doesn't want that control! You must be the one to lead things. You should have just told her you can't wait around for her and you'll just go with 'someone else.'

You do have someone else, don't you? If not, you didn't read the "D.O.W." chapter again in The Dating Black Book.

3) Assuming that once a woman is interested in you, she will STAY interested in you. Not so. Her emotions and attraction will ebb and flow. You must always assume you're starting from ground level with her.

4) Getting irritated that she was there and did something you didn't expect. Women will do this to you for the REST of your LIFE. Start getting used to it now. The one thing that will curb this kind of behavior is acting like a stronger male role model. (Otherwise known as an ALPHA MAN.)

You should have walked right over and started chatting up her friend, in a happy, couldn't-give-a-shit attitude. Oh, and you should have done this with your 'someone else' that you went to lunch with.

Being an Alpha Man is more than knowing one strategy that fits-all. (There's no such thing.)

When you ask how to act or what to say, this has to come from the heart. The simple answer is that you must act with confidence and power. You act like YOU, but the strong, confident version of YOU.

Peace – Stay Alpha

- Carlos Xuma

It's a well-known secret that the one thing you can do to make yourself more attractive to women is to stand out from the crowd.

You gotta be DIFFERENT.

So how do you DO that?

Easy… Here are 3 ways you can start to differentiate yourself…

1) Get weird – once in a while…

I'm being a little tongue-in cheek here, but I really think that one thing that makes people stand out are small things called idiosyncrasies.

These are the weird things you do that are often endearing rather than off-putting.

I'm not talking about picking your nose here.

If you've seen "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" – the adventure with Brangelina in it, you might remember the scene where she figures out who her husband is by the way he shakes his leg when he's done peeing.

Use these little ticks to demonstrate your personality.

2) Get edumacated…

Start going online and looking up weird trivia and facts.

Just google "weird trivia" and you'll find some crazy stuff.

Like:

• Only one person in 2 billion will live to be 116 or older
• 111,111,111 multiplied by 111,111,111 is 12,345,678,987,654,321
• The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds

This stuff makes for fun and interesting conversation.

USE IT!

3) Try growing your facial hair in a different way.

I have a friend who shaves his beard down to two thin lines that connect his sideburns. The line follows his jawbone, and is about 1/4 inch wide.

Try something like this, and then change it in a couple weeks. I grow and shave off my soul-patch all the time. If you don't see me for a month, you never know what I'll look like.

Go ahead and play with your image.

Because your image is NOT your identity…

Try all these tips to start making you look different – and FEEL different from the rest of the guys out there.

Women WILL notice…

- Carlos Xuma

http://www.carlosxuma.com

Here's a very interesting article from Newsweek on how our boys are struggling here in the U.S.

Take a read through it, and then read my comments below…
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Struggling School-Age Boys – by Peg Tyre
A new study says parents are right to worry about their sons.

Every other week it seems a new study comes out that adds to our already-formidable arsenal of parental worries. But even by those escalating standards, the report issued last week by the federal government's National Center for Health Statistics contained a jaw-dropper: the parents of nearly one of every five boys in the United States were concerned enough about what they saw as their sons' emotional or behavioral problems that they consulted a doctor or a health-care professional. By comparison, about one out of 10 parents of girls reported these kinds of problems.

The report confirms what many of us have been observing for some time now: that lots of school-age boys are struggling. And, parents are intensely worried about them.

What is ailing our sons? Some experts suggest we are witnessing an epidemic of ADHD and say boys need more medication. Others say that environmental pollutants found in plastics, among other things, may be eroding their attention spans and their ability to regulate their emotions.

Those experts may be right but I have another suggestion. Let's examine the way our child rearing and our schools have evolved in the last 10 years. Then ask ourselves this challenging question: could some of those changes we have embraced in our families, our communities and our schools be driving our sons crazy?

Instead of unstructured free play, parents now schedule their kids' time from dawn till dusk (and sometimes beyond.) By age 4, an ever-increasing number of children are enrolled in preschool. There, instead of learning to get along with other kids, hold a crayon and play Duck, Duck, Goose, children barely out of diapers are asked to fill out work sheets, learn computation or study Mandarin. The drumbeat for early academics gets even louder when they enter "real" school.

Veteran teachers will tell you that first graders are now routinely expected to master a curriculum that, only 15 years ago, would have been considered appropriate for second, even third graders. The way we teach children has changed, too. In many communities, elementary schools have become test-prep factories—where standardized testing begins in kindergarten and "teaching to the test" is considered a virtue.

At the same time, recess is being pushed aside in order to provide extra time for reading and math drills. So is history and opportunities for hands-on activities—like science labs and art. Active play is increasingly frowned on—some schools have even banned recess and tag. In the wake of school shootings like the tragedy at Virginia Tech, kids who stretch out a pointer finger, bend their thumb and shout "pow!" are regarded with suspicion and not a little fear.

Our expectations for our children have been ramped up but the psychological and physical development of our children has remained about the same. Some kids are thriving in the changing world. But many aren't. What parents and teachers see—and what this government study now shows—is that the ones who can't handle it are disproportionately boys.

Some researchers responded to last weeks' study by calling for more resources for more mental-health services for children—especially males. That's an admirable goal. But when nearly one in five boys has such serious behavioral and emotional issues that their parents are talking it over with their pediatrician, you can bet we are facing a problem that requires a more fundamental change in our society than medication or weekly therapy.

Let's take a moment, before the school year gets any farther underway, and ask ourselves whether we are raising and educating our boys in a way that respects their natural development. And if we are not, let's figure out how we can bring our family life and our schools back into line.

This is one study that we ignore at our peril.
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CARLOS XUMA COMMENTS:

Well, boo-hoo. We're raising the bar on our education, and now everyone is crying that this is causing problems for our kids?

COME ON!

Environmental pollutants?

More medications?

NO!

What boys need are strong, present role models.

As in, their dads should be raising them as men. Challenging them.

And then helping them overcome those challenges so they can learn how to live up to their own destiny.

AND their dads need to actually BE THERE. Single parent families are more prevalent, but they are also a hazard to boys, because most boys do not have strong male role models around.

Sorry, ladies. You aren't a strong male role model any more than a man is a nurturing female presence.

Now, I will agree that more active play is needed, but not the kind that's in front of an X-box or Wii. They need to get outside and start getting hurt.

I hear boys crying and complaining all the time about getting hurt. "Ow! Ouch! OWIE…"

When I was a kid, I just brushed myself off and kept playing. None of this "Ow!" crap. If you cried about a boo-boo, the other boys thought you were a wuss.

Stop coddling our boys and start treating them like kids who will eventually be MEN.

What do you think?

Am I just a nut case on this one? Post your comments below…

There's a lot of talk about pickup out there, but what about what comes after?

You're going to hear a lot about this in the coming weeks and months as many of the guys in the community come around to the fact that guys really do want to have a single girlfriend.

Let's face it, pickup skills really only carry you through the first ten minutes of so of any interaction with a woman. From there, you've got to know what to do to keep her attracted.

And what if you decide you'd actually like to have a relationship with a particular woman (or women?) What will you do to keep her interested long-term?

Most importantly, how are you going to "wear the pants"…without losing your shirt?

Unfortunately, there's just not a lot of information out there on how to manage relationships.

Well, that's all about to change.

My friend Scot McKay has just announced his new relationship management system called The Leading Man.

If you've ever worked hard to get a woman's phone number, gone out on a date with her and watch her disappear without a trace shortly thereafter, then this is for you.

Scot talks about "locking down the revolving door of women in your life". I think he's on to something there, because just about every guy can relate to that kind of frustration.

In The Leading Man you'll find a complete toolkit for relationship management. Whether you want to date multiple women long-term, find the one great woman for you, or both, McKay has got your back.

Seriously, this is one action-packed system that's contains roughly zero "fluff". And considering the track record backing The Leading Man, I'd say we've got exactly the right man for the job teaching this stuff.

Here's where you can check it out, which I highly encourage:

The Leading Man

Take a look, and enjoy the four free videos Scot's got for you. You can start using the tips he gives you RIGHT NOW. Rumor has it that he's going to have some cool surprise bonuses for those who get on his information list, too.

After all, life is way too short to have a "revolving door" of women in and out of your life. Pickup skills carry you through the first ten minutes. Relationship management is forever.

So take a look at the site, and be sure to share your comments.

As you know, I like to read Dan Kennedy's articles from time to time – which have NO real connection to picking up women other than the principles of better Alpha Lifestyle that he professes…

Here's a short bit from a recent newsletter that I think you should consider…
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Still, most people seem more concerned with getting out of and away from work and doing as little as possible rather than getting into work so interesting and rewarding they’re eager to do it.

I think you deserve to brag if you work intelligently, efficiently, productively, reap enormous rewards, leverage yourself, and – when you play, have all the money and liberty to play very, very well. But I don’t think there’s anything to brag about in not working.
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CARLOS XUMA COMMENTS:

Keep in mind that the one trait women do NOT find attractive – not even in joking – and not even when they even joke about it themselves – is LAZINESS.

Women love AMBITION.

Drive.

ACTION.

What's up Carlos,

I ride the local city bus quite often during the week. One of the bus routes that I take is roughly a 25 min. ride. (Depending on the driver.) I'm not in a rut by no means. But if I see a woman that I want to talk to, I can't engage and disengage like you say that we can do.

Because I'm stuck in a seat for 25 min whether I'm close or far away from her. (Not all the time, but typically all the seats are occupied.)

But this is what I thought up of. If there is a vacant seat next to, or behind her, I could do it at the end of the ride last 5 to 7 min or so. Then I can engage and disengage.

But here's the problem. If all the seats are occupied, then I could get off at the same stop as her. But that's hardly, and never guaranteed, (Because I have my own stop to get off at.) It's possible, more likely even, that I could get off before or after her.

Like I said, I'm in no rut, I'm not going to sweat it. Neither am I creating excuses for myself. As you see above. (Now if you see any excuses, tell me please Carlos!) If I don't get to talk to her, then oh well, next! But my question is giving what I told about this little, ah how do I say. A very well appreciated puzzle.

What would you think up of Carlos?

Oh and by the way this buzz before approaching women is more tolerant, actually by me invited, to the point I wouldn't think of it as crazy to approach. =Fun!

One way I made my self get tolerant is to say, hello, good morning, good afternoon etc. That, a few things, and then everything else is you of course.

Isn't that great. Thanks a lot my friend.

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CARLOS XUMA RESPONDS:

That's a great observation, and I'm not sure you realize just how important this is.

The very process of approaching women should give you a slight buzz. It's a natural high of energy that can't be beat. You don't need drugs or alcohol to get an altered state of mind.

What do most guys do with this energy?

They suppress it or shame it away. Which is only done out of FEAR.

Afraid of rejection, or afraid of what a challenge this might be to their self-image, most can't stay in that space with that kind of energy.

Which is a shame in itself because the energy you get from this experience is a real juice. It's better than any cup of coffee I've ever had.

Just last night I was sparring with some of the students in my martial arts school. They were all well below me in terms of rank, but I wanted to give them a little experience in what they might experience on the street. (As if they're going to be attacked by a black belt anytime soon, right.)

When I got done, I was tingling with the energy of INTERACTION. It was a blast! And even one of the students came up to me and said, "It's a bargain to PAY for this kind of experience."

I agreed.

The other point here is that you're doing the right thing by warming yourself and getting "tolerant" as you said. Getting into the groove by just saying hello to people is a good way to dissociate yourself from all those worries about other people's opinion of you. You start to realize that YOU are in CONTROL of the world.

Most people are far too scared to put themselves out on the line like this. And the sad fact is that you're risking NOTHING.

You have NOTHING to lose, but we're all so afraid of being rejected, we hide in our little cocoons.

As for your bus riding dilemma, I used to encounter this myself. It's a unique situation if you're on the bus with somebody for that period of time.

I would start by positioning yourself in a way that you can encounter them either getting on or off. Then you can say hello and gauge their reaction to you a little and decide if you want to go further with it.

I do not recommend going uncomfortably out of your way (i.e., getting off at their stop) just to meet her. Too contrived.

Instead, why not make it a point to stand, even if there are seats, or offer your seat to her. This will position you to talk to her and give you a reason to talk to her.

Be brave. There isn't always a clever (or even obvious) way of talking to her, and that's what most women appreciate anyway.

Directness. It's flattering, and confident.

These are just some of the things I cover in the Approach Women NOW program.

Your friend,

Carlos

Lately I've been working on collecting some of my random thoughts and ideas together so that I can put them into the skeleton of a new program for men on inner game and unstoppable confidence.

One of the things that guys are asking more about – and it's something that I'm all too happy to talk about – is the subject of relationships.

(Gasp from the crowd…)

Yes, despite all that you see on TV and hear from women out there, men really do want relationships.

And with ONE woman.

We want the POWER to have many women, but in the end, every man just wants ONE quality woman in his life.

There are a few mistakes guys make along the way, though, that keep them from getting a relationship they can fully commit to. (Yes, I know I used the "c" word there.)

I just want to talk about one of the biggest mistakes in this newsletter, and maybe I'll cover the rest in future reports.

So what is this big mistake men make?

And – more importantly – how can you avoid making this mistake?

The mistake is simply one word:

SETTLING.

That's right. As in "settle down."

You see, "settling" is not a good way to view this. Guys look at it this way, because we're trying to radically reduce the amount of drama in our lives. Guys just want things smooth and calm.

Settling – as it pertains to women and lifestyle – is defined as:

"Adopting a more steady or secure style of life."

That sounds very nice, but the reality is that "steadiness and security" is what we seek when we're trying to make things low-intensity.

Relationships, in order to last, must have some intensity to them. Excitement…

You ever seen a couple that has lost that "intensity"? They end up a bit… well, they end up boring. You'd swear they were brother and sister.

They start dressing and acting alike.

And often they start to LOOK alike.

They seem like activity partners rather than the jumpy horn-dogs they ought to be. They stay up to watch Letterman's monologue, and then it's off to bed…

Routine.

Well, this is the kind of relationship a lot of guys get into mostly because they want to stop "playing the field" and they want to "settle down."

But what "settle down" really means is this:

Lock in some woman that you can comfortably keep around. A woman who will simply "settle" with you.

Let's be realistic here. You don't want a woman that's going to drive you nuts with the level of intensity and drama that just gets your ulcers burning like a hot coal in the pit of your stomach.

On the other hand, you don't want a woman who won't challenge you and inspire you to grow and become a better person. Because THAT, my fellow Alpha Brothers, is what relationships are all about.

Not about dooming yourself into a 50 year relationship…

Not about "locking one in…"

But about being all you can be through the challenge of a close, intimate relationship.

You see, you'll learn more about yourself in the context of a long-term relationship than you ever will in a series of "pickups" or one night stands.

So how do you avoid this trap of getting into a relationship – and then staying there – only because it's less painful than being single?

Let me lay out the steps for you. These are the tried and true strategies I've used for years now, and they're VERY effective.

Step One: Date as many women as you can…

That's right. The best thing you can do as research for a long-term relationship – as you develop your dating skills – is to date a LOT of women.

You've probably heard me say this a million times, but it can't be repeated too much. You simply MUST date other women. You don't want to jump into a relationship just because you have nothing better going on.

You go into a relationship because that's the next logical step on the path that you're on.

You never want to feel like women are scarce, and that you must grab one up and marry her just because you think you might end up old and alone.

Step Two: Figure out what you're looking for in a relationship along the way.

The one thing most people never do is look at their past mistakes and re-examine their true motives for getting into a relationship in the first place.

A relationship is something that should be a CHOICE, not something you fall into because you don't want to be alone, or you're afraid of hurting the woman.

This is a really common pattern I used to get into with women. It would start with a phone call to ask her out to do something, and the next thing you know, we're in bed.

Wow, I said to myself. Now what? Oh, okay, I guess we're boyfriend and girlfriend now.

It was just easier than admitting to myself that this wasn't what I was looking for. I was also feeling guilty that I had slept with this woman, and now she's going to want a relationship.

(You'll find that this is BAD programming that a lot of guys have, and I talk about this at length in The Dating Black Book…)

Getting into a lot of short term relationships helps you figure out what you want a LONG term relationship to do for you.

Step Three: Figure out what you're looking for in a woman along the way

You won't know this up front, and that's why I made this step 3. You have to date a whole bunch of women to figure out what it is that you actually want from her when you find her.

I'll tell you this – one of the biggest mistakes I see guys make (and it's one I've made SO many times over the years) is that they want to date only one specific physical type, and no other.

In other words, they're all hung up on the "librarian" type, or the "stripper" type, or the "rocker" type.

Sometimes it's an appearance thing, too, like dating only blondes, or women with short hair.

I can tell you from experience that the woman you click with will probably NOT be the type you expect. In fact, the one thing that holds guys back from much faster success in finding the right kind of woman is often sticking too close to their "type."

I always liked the short, gymnast type. You know, small tight body. Short hair.

I'm currently dating a tall, leggy Asian girl.

Go figure.

I also thought I'd enjoy a woman that was a firecracker – full of energy and sarcastic challenge.

Nope.

That turned out to annoy the hell out of me after a while. These women very often weren't in touch with their femininity and that made it nearly impossible to have a healthy dynamic with her.

The point is that if you don't date ALL types, you'll fall into some predictable – and sometimes hazardous – patterns of behavior, because you'll only be tuning your relationship skills to one kind of woman. And that kind of woman might not really be compatible with YOU.

So use this "dating around" time to really get a sense of what kind of woman you are capable of hanging with.

Avoid the dreaded mistake of "settling" for a woman. Instead, find a woman that you would dream of having, and then do the necessary research and field work (can you call this work?).

As I like to say, you should only be in a relationship with a woman who brings out the best in you.

There is no more important decision you will make in your life than the woman you will make your partner.

Stay Alpha…

- Carlos Xuma
http://www.datingdynamics.com