Carlos Xuma's Dating Tips for Guys

Well, guys, I've got mixed feelings about today's entry.

- It's funny. Some great moments here. Definitely makes a good point about THINKING before you give a woman a gift.

But on the other hand:

- Yet another way men are shamed into submission and fear of women.

But I'll let you decide on this one.

Thumbs up, or thumbs down?

Why?

Comment below…

I read Dan Kennedy's newsletter this morning, and once again there were some good words of wisdom for any man who feels beaten down or gloomy because of the "economy" or whatever else we have that could be a source of fear in our lives…

______________________
The other night, on Larry King, Clinton said: “When you get beat up and knocked down, you are supposed to get up, not give up.”

American politics, business, entertainment, sports, every aspect of life is full of stories of recovery, redemption, and public forgiveness. We are generally gracious in accepting apologies. We tend to evaluate others based on the totality of their contributions, not any single events. We celebrate the comeback. This is one of the things that makes this such a terrific and remarkable place to live. Consider, in some other cultures, situations like those mentioned above require one to fall upon the sword, or banishes a person to permanent exile. Not here. Here, the only way you face permanent exile is by choice.

Know this: whether small or large, you need never accept any disappointment, loss, failure, neglect or adversity as a final outcome. If you have neglected customers in your business, lost customers’ interest can be re-ignited, collectively or individually. If you have spent rather than saved, lost time can be made up. If you have erred in some more monumental way, it is never too late to correct course, and there’s no better time to start than today. Dr. Maltz: “You are not your mistakes.

You might want to think a bit about whatever elephants you are trying to pretend aren’t in the room, whatever mistakes you’ve let be lasting that could be reversed, whatever goals ought be dusted off and renewed.

______________________
CARLOS XUMA COMMENTS:

As we near 2009, I'm already planning for a bigger, better, best year.

That's all I allow into my world and my reality.

And soon I'll be revealing some of the cool stuff surrounding my latest project…

Stay tuned!

From the NY Post:

9-YEAR-OLD REVEALS DATING SECRETS

He's only 9, but this pint-sized pickup artist already knows plenty about pleasing the ladies.

So much, in fact, that Alec Greven's dating primer, "How to Talk to Girls" – which began as a handwritten, $3 pamphlet sold at his school book fair – hit the shelves nationwide last week.

The fourth-grader from Castle Rock, Colo., advises Lothario wannabes to stop showing off, go easy on the compliments to avoid looking desperate – and be wary of "pretty girls."

"It is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewelry," he writes in Chapter Three.

"Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil."

He advises, "The best choice for most boys is a regular girl. Remember, some pretty girls are coldhearted when it comes to boys. Don't let them get to you."

Over a few Shirley Temples yesterday at Langan's on West 47 Street, Alec said that he culled his wisdom by peeking at his peers at play.

"I saw a lot of boys that had trouble talking to girls," Alec said.

As for his how-to, he concedes, "I never expected people to buy it like a regular book in a bookstore."

But with classic plain-spoken advice – like "comb your hair and don't wear sweats" – it's no surprise his 46-page book was a hit with boys and girls of all ages.

He believes the best way to approach a girl is to keep it to a simple "hi."

"If I say hi and you say hi back, we're probably off to a good start," he said.

As for his own love life, he said he is not dating anyone at the moment. "I'm a little too young," he confessed.

In his book, published by HarperCollins, he suggests holding off on falling in love until at least middle school.

Dating – which he defines as going out to dinner without your parents – is for "kind of old" people, who are 15 or 16.

Officials at the Soaring Hawk Elementary School said he wrote the book – which was the runaway bestseller at its book fair – for kids, but believe anyone can find inspiration in it.

Alec's mother, Erin Greven, credits her son's beyond-his-years insight to his avid reading.

"He reads nonstop. At dinner, I say, 'Put your book down,' " she said.

Alec – who just finished a children's book on the Watergate scandal – said he wants to be a full-time writer when he grows up, with a weekend job in archaeology or paleontology.
______________________
CARLOS XUMA COMMENTS:

I say good for him…

This kid might be my competition someday. It gives me great hope that some guys are learning the right information early on.

I am just happy that – even though the article is written in a cutesie sort of condescending tone – people seem to understand that it is something of a problem for young guys.

My only concern is that his contribution will be laughed at as just silly adolescent ideas.

My favorite line:

"Pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil."

Yes, they can be, Alec.

Yes, indeed.

Holiday Hookups | Carlos Xuma and Scot McKay

Find out how to get a great woman to hang out with for the holidays, and what to do once you've found her. Everything from how to handle Christmas parties, gift advice, fashion, social dynamics and–of course–secrets to making New Year's Eve a blast.

If you weren't able to make the call, we've got cleanly edited copies of the latest tele-seminar available for you to download.

Scot McKay, Dean Cortez, and I gave up tips on holiday dating and how to maximize your opportunities to meet women this season, and how to kick off 2009 with the best bang of all.

Get a copy of the Holiday Hookups Tips…