What To Say To Women

3 Secrets For What To Say To Women In Conversation...

A lot of guys wonder how to talk to women and what to say to women, but it's not really as complicated as we make it. In fact, it's really pretty easy to know what to say to women if you follow a simple blueprint.

Let me tell you a quick story. Way back when I was starting to learn the secrets for attracting women and what to say to women, I made a discovery that made all the difference in how women responded to me.

I was on a date with a beautiful redhead named Athena (no joke - that was her real name). Athena and I were out at a San Francisco bar named Vesuvios having a few drinks. She was enjoying herself, and I felt pretty good about how the date was going. I even thought I might get a little more at the end of the date, if you know what I mean.

Well, at some point in the evening, just when I thought it couldn't get any hotter, Athena started cooling off. It was gradual at first, and then she steadily got COLDER as the night went on. The more I tried to restart the fire, the worse it got. Eventually, she asked me to take her home. She was "tired," or so she said.

Wow, talk about the "drive of shame." I tried to start up more conversation in the car, it was like trying to small talk with a bouncer at an expensive nightclub. You could cut the silence with a knife. Needless to say, I didn't get anywhere with Athena that night - or ever again.

You probably figured out what I did wrong there. But if you didn't, I'll reveal my big mistake - and something else you must know when you talk to women. I'm going to start by revealing the 3 Secrets of What To Say To Women...

What To Say To Women - Hidden Secret 1: Light matches

When I was about 7 years old, I was out playing with my friend Matt in the apartment complex where I grew up. We were out just having fun, and I happened upon a book of matches that someone had dropped. We started lighting them and putting them in a plastic cup, just watching them burn. I noticed that if you slid the match on that strip on the matchbook and you did it too slow, the match wouldn't light.

But if you literally "strike" that match on the back (the same as the instructions on the matchbook, funny enough), that was enough friction to light the match.

Later on, I realized that this is a lot like conversation and learning what to say to women. You have to be willing to start things up with that burst of energy.

Even at the risk of being "too much" for a woman, you have to get a little - dare I say - incendiary.

When you're talking to women, make sure you're not trying too hard to be nice and chilled out. Humans have this uncontrollable mean streak that comes out when we have to deal with someone that drains us. This is the side of us that makes us mistreat needy people and dump "nice people."

If you don't risk putting the whole interaction on the line with her, you're probably never going to get to the point of really lighting the match.

What To Say To Women - Hidden Secret 2: No facts, ma'am.

Another big mistakes we make - as guys - is to make our conversations with women all about facts and hard data.

Women HATE this kind of talk. It bores the heck out of them. We men like it because it represents nice absolutes, and guys like to be able to put things in their absolute little drawer in the garage of life.

But women want something different: They want to talk about FEELINGS.

I know, ick.

But that doesn't mean you have to suddenly become a therapist to know what to say to women. All you really need to do is just start talking about topics that guys AND girls like to talk about.

I'll give you a fast clue as to what works best: DRAMA.

Ever see one of those celebrities on the cover of "People" or some other magazine you normally roll your eyes at when you're at the checkout register? Yes, that's the stuff right there. Celebrity drama works GREAT for conversation with women.

So drop the facts, man, and remember that what to say to women always means talking about something she can get emotionally involved in.

What To Say To Women - Hidden Secret 3: Know when to SHUT UP.

Most guys spend a hell of a lot of time learning what to say to women, but never knowing when they should NOT talk to women. Not all the work of attracting women is about you doing the talking.

Ever heard these phrases:

"Silence is golden."

"Think before you speak, or suffer for your words."

Or, my favorite: "It is better to be silent and thought a fool than to open ones mouth and remove all doubt."

So you remember that date with Athena where I botched things up badly? Well the big lesson I learned was that I had her good and ready, but I kept talking and talking and boring her out of her skull. In short, I OVERSOLD her.

This is known in some circles as "snatching defeat from the jaws of victory."

When you've made the sale, CLOSE the sale. And shut up!

You might even try to make sure you're shifting the burden of talk by asking more questions than you are answering them. That will ensure you don't talk your way out of your own success.

Sometimes it's not what to say to women - it's what NOT to say that gets you what you want.

There you go, three hidden secrets of what to say to women. If you use these tips when you talk to women, you'll avoid most of the traps and pitfalls that the other guys fall into out there.